Haiti, mwen renmen ou

Since my studies in college, my heart has always gone out to Haiti. Part of that came from a great deal of my friends being Haitian. And then I learned about Haiti's history. And Haiti's current position. I learned that it was one of the poorest country's in the World.

The latter didn't come as a shock. The entire continent of Africa is continuously stripped of its resources leaving the people poorer than poor. And not just Africa. Parts of India and....

I'm getting off topic. What I mean is, my heart is broken. Why did this have to happen to Haiti of all places? I just...I don't know what to say. Makes all of the things I want seem so unimportant.

They say things happen for a reason. That sometimes devastation happens because God wants mankind to help each other. I don't see how this makes sense in this case considering no one really helped Haiti to begin with.

I'm sounding really ignorant right now but that's only because I'm upset. Not to justify ignorance but....yeah.

I've been doing a lot of devotional reading lately. I spend a good 15 minutes a night praying and talking to God. It has been so soul cleansing. Tonight after my reading I'm going to pray for Haiti. And I'm going to pray for my selfishness. How silly of me to be worried about a 3rd job when some don't have 1. How unfair of me to worry about traveling to Europe this summer when others don't even know how they are going to eat tomorrow. I know I shouldn't stop living because of the world's issues but I don't feel right when I'm "living it up" and my closest friends have just lost loved ones. Just a few days ago I wrote a check in church to a family who lost everything in a house fire. Everything. I hope my $25 can do something.

Yesterday I got an email from a Clumps reader. She was telling me how Clumps brought her joy during a tough time. When readers send me emails like this I always tell them that their support is what keeps me going.

I don't know what this has to do with Haiti. I guess what I'm saying is I think one of my callings is to help and inspire. But with that comes a lot of guilt when I can't help everyone.

I don't know. Haiti mwen renmen ou.