Friday, February 12, 2010
My Funny Valentine
Not that I don't think enough anyway but...
I thought about celibacy. And how much it means to me. Even though people laugh. Even though I laugh at it myself sometimes. It's a struggle. But one that I need. I have a completely different view about sex than most. Very few understand.
But that's another blog post for another day.
I love Valentine's Day. Even as a single woman. It has never bothered me. Maybe because no matter what city I'm in my Mom still mails me a box of goodies. And my Dad sends me flowers. I was the only 5th grader getting balloons and candy delivered to me on Valentine's Day. I know I'm supposed to hate love. I'm supposed to be bitter and annoyed. I'm supposed to be depressed and feel lonely and desirous. I'm supposed to wonder when I'll meet that dream man.
But I'm not. And I don't. America's attack on "Why Black women aren't getting married" thing doesn't scare me anymore. I'm glad I don't have children right now. I don't want children right now. My friends who are parents get offended when I say it but I won't my children to be planned. Of course nothing goes as planned but I at least want to be in a financially and emotionally sound position before I crank out kids.
And I don't want to have kids out of wedlock. Some people say things just "happen". I don't want that to happen to me. I. Me. I would never judge others but I know what Brittany wants and doesn't want. In fact if you asked me what my biggest nightmare is, that would be it. Actually that and messing up my credit score.
Ah well...I'm just learning and growing. I don't worry as much about where I'm supposed to be and what I'm suppposed to do. All I can do is keep being BFFs with God and finding purpose in all I do.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile
Posted by B at 7:06 AM